Surgery, Uncategorized

The Future of My Boobs (FOMB)

Do you heart this blog? Well, it’s now a real, live book baby! Get your copy on Amazon. #mygurucancer 

FOMB Logo

Over the past 2 months, I have been contemplating surgery options ~ a lumpectomy, mastectomy, or double mastectomy ~ and a decision has finally arrived. I would love to tell you that all I had to do was sit quietly in meditation and watch this clear beautiful neon-sign-of-an-answer show up before my eyes.

This was so NOT the case for me.

The “peace with the unknown” I initially experienced about surgery options turned out to have a pretty quick expiration date. In fact, the whole “decision-making” process has been the most challenging, gut-wrenching, emotional part of this entire journey so far. Chemo was a freaking breeze compared to the turmoil my mind has gone through. There were times I wished I didn’t have a choice. There was even a moment I wished the cancer would show up somewhere else in my breast so I could know what to do. Why? Because I was believing the thought…

“I will make the wrong decision.”

Under the influence of this thought, I am paralyzed with fear. My mind can only see the worse case scenario of each option. It’s all shit and I’m forced to choose the lesser of two evil shits. For the 1st time, I truly feel like a victim and I am furious that I’m in this situation. I want someone/something to give me a clear answer. I worry what people will think of me if I choose this or that. I tell myself I’m a failure at being “peaceful.” I’m overcome with emotions and I tighten my body which leads to exhaustion, achier muscles, and headaches. In summary, when I believe this thought, I feel like complete, total, utter crap.

Without the thought – and it took some time get my mind here – I feel so much lighter. The pressure is lifted (literally) off my shoulders and I again, see the blessings in each option. I feel more motivated and open to learning more if needed, talking to others, sitting with myself, & enjoying my life. I feel empowered, open, free, and trusting of my own intuition and the universe.

Turn it around to: “I will make the right decision.”

Suddenly, I am reminded that each option has major bonuses. A lumpectomy is an easier surgery plus I found a plastic surgeon who can do another procedure so my boobs look similar. I get to keep my natural breasts and they’ll be smaller which is nice for my shoulders. A mastectomy gives me peace of mind that the cancer is 100% gone and there’s way less of a chance of reoccurrence. I don’t need to worry about monitoring my lumpy breasts with diagnostic tests & biopsies. My breasts will look more like they did before I began treatment and they’ll stay perky for life which is also nice for my shoulders! And looking back at my history, have I ever really made a “wrong” decision? Even the times I thought something bad was happening…it turned out to be even better than I imagined. I broke my ankle and then met my husband when he offered me a stool to sit on…we were kicked out of our apartment and ended up moving to a retreat property and creating a new business…I failed my first yoga training and then started my own private practice. The only thing that could go “wrong” is the label my mind puts on it. Also, I will make the right decision – something will feel really right at some point.

Hmmmm….feeling much better.

Here are some other stressful thoughts I have taken to inquiry:

People will judge me.

If I choose a lumpectomy, the cancer will come back.

If I choose a double, I will not like my breasts.

I should be more peaceful in this process.

I want the universe to give me a clear decision.

I am not “evolved” if I choose a double mastectomy.

I need to be at peace with my decision.

Doing The Work really helped to bring me back to the present moment and clear my mind of some major bullshit. And I noticed I still go back and forth to attaching to some of these thoughts. Here are a few other techniques that have supported me.

Clarifying My Intention

Sitting with the questions, “Why am I choosing surgery? What is its purpose? What do I want from this experience in the longterm?” helped me to clarify a clear vision to hold as I walk through different options. For me, it boils down to:

  • Cure this body of cancer cells
  • Prevent cancer cells from returning
  • Feel longterm mental peace
  • Look/feel good about my body

Gathering Information

I dove into learning as much info as I could about each option. This included asking more questions to my breast & plastic surgeon, getting a 2nd opinion for surgery and reconstruction, and talking with other women who have had each type of surgery. Some new info I learned was:

  • A much less invasive lumpectomy is an option with my 2nd opinion breast surgeon. Of course, clear margins are needed which could lead to more surgeries.
  • There is a higher risk of reoccurrence with a lumpectomy; a double mastectomy drops the reoccurrence rate from 12% to 1%. The survival rate is the same.
  • For a lumpectomy, “you get what you get” in terms how the breast looks is not true – there are plastic surgery techniques to help the breasts look even. In a separate surgery, the other breast can be reduced and lifted (which involves cutting out the nipple and moving it up). After a lumpectomy is complete, there is more monitoring of the breast tissue with frequent mammograms and ultrasounds.
  • For a single mastectomy, the plastic surgeon can make the other side match. However, over time – aging will make the real breast sag while the other remains the same.
  • For a single or double mastectomy, there are at least 2 surgeries. The 1st is when the breast tissue is removed and expanders are put in place to help stretch the skin and prepare the breasts for implants. The implants are done months after radiation and extra fat is injected between the implants and the skin for a natural look & feel. My 2nd opinion plastic surgeon offers a less invasive technique for reconstruction that includes the use of implants + liposuction. He would use fat grafting (liposuction) in more forgiving areas like “love handles” which leaves very little scarring and is an easy recovery. The 1st surgeon wanted to do implants + belly fat which involves a 3rd pretty intense surgery that cuts the stomach from hip to hip to gather belly fat to help build the breasts. After these surgeries, there are no more mammograms or ultrasounds – just the occasional chest X-ray.
  • Radiation will be recommended regardless of which surgery I choose because cancer was found in my lymph nodes.

Two things began to become clear: (1) I prefer my 2nd opinion medical team: Dr. Laidley (breast surgeon) and Dr. Antonetti (plastic surgeon) at Medical City and (2) doing a single mastectomy was not an option for me. It’s either a lumpectomy or a double.

I also have REALLY loved connecting with women who have been through this. There is an instant bond that exists with cancer patients and survivors ~ an immediate sense of connection and compassion. I also received a helpful reminder from each woman that it’s completely normal to feel everything I am feeling. Fear, worry, anxiety, doubt….these are all natural human emotions in life and in this process. I am not alone. Ever. For some of the women who chose a lumpectomy, the cancer came back and they ended up getting a mastectomy or a double. The ones who were very happy with their lumpectomy and are still cancer-free had a much smaller tumor initially with no involvement of the lymph nodes. For the double mastectomy women, most of them said the procedure was hard but not as tough as they thought it would be, and not one person regretted their decision.

Everyone I talked to reminded me that this is a personal decision; I need to do what feels right for me.

After many weeks of this information gathering phase, I started to get completely overwhelmed…I had thought that during one of the meetings, something would just click and my decision would be made. But I still felt torn. I knew it was bad when one day, my husband asked me if I wanted a salad for dinner. If so, he would go to the store and buy lettuce. I completely freaked out on him, ran into the room sobbing, “YOU make the decision! I can’t handle it!”

I had to take a break and step away from it all for a few days. Then Type A Bethany took over with…

The Good Ol’ PRO/CON List

Yep, I’m a dork and created an entire spreadsheet titled “The Future of My Boobs” which listed out the pro’s and con’s with each surgery option, along with the procedure recommended by each doctor, and additional questions/things to consider. I then scheduled a FOMB meeting with my mom and husband and we walked through everything together. At this time I was a week away from my last chemo session so chemo brain was in full effect. This process helped to better organize my thoughts and make sure I had a clear understanding of each option. Here it is in case it’s helpful for you too.

Lumpectomy Pro Con Bethany Webb Double Pro Con Bethany Webb

Trying it on & Feeling it out

I decided to “try on” my two different decisions as if I were trying on a new dress. Ok, I’m doing a lumpectomy. How does it feel? Do I notice any physical sensations? How do I feel as I imagine the next 60 years? Then I tried on the double.

This is what shocked me the most. When I try on a lumpectomy…I lose my breath and constrict my body. I feel anxious.

When I try on a double, I feel relief.

This is not what I expected to feel. I mean, after all – I ended up getting what I thought I wanted with a less invasive lumpectomy. But the truth is, it still didn’t feel right. I have what doctors call “Fibrocystic Breast Disease” which is a fancy term for “super lump boobs.” So for me, a lumpectomy feels easier this year, but harder in the long run with the constant monitoring of my breast tissue. A double feels harder now but so much better as I imagine the rest of my life.

I also noticed that when I would talk to people about it, I was looking for them to tell me it was ok to choose a double mastectomy. I mean shit, there was also that moment of hoping for more cancer to show up so I could make this decision. Instead of looking outward for that permission, I decided to give it to myself instead.

So yes, I have chosen to do a double mastectomy.

If you are surprised by my decision, so am I. If you are relieved by my decision, so am I.

Yet still…

Still I don’t know

I had felt so incredibly solid in my decision for weeks and then I found out the reconstruction process may take longer than I had originally thought – it could be NEXT spring or summer. This threw me over the edge and I began to second guess EVERYTHING. Am I making a mistake? Will I regret it? Are these just pre-surgery jitters or is my heart talking? Back to the ping-pong match of going back and forth between options. I’m not going to lie – the past few weeks have kind of sucked ass.

All I wanted was that feeling of clarity to come back and stay forever.

I discovered that I really, really, really needed to spend time with my emotions – give them the FULL expression. I’ve gone from feeling perfectly fine to sobbing within seconds. I had a hard time sleeping and would wake up in the middle of the night in tears. I felt like movement helped – longer walks, jumping on the trampoline, yoga, epson salt baths. One day, in a fit of anger, I tore up a cardboard box…I attended an incredible Somatic Movement + Sound Healing Workshop ~ I cried before, a little during, and a ton afterwards. My husband held me on many occasions and facilitated me on additional stressful thoughts. It was so clear that suffering started in my mind and then the body followed. But this awareness angered me even more – I was watching it happen and couldn’t just press the “off” button.

IMG_3636 (2)I also feel like I’ve been experiencing a natural mourning/grieving process for my breasts. They will never be the same as they once were. Well, actually – they are already not the same! But how do I know they won’t be better? The worse that can happen is my stressful story about them. I’ve spent some time drawing pictures of my old boobs too which was healing.

One day, I was journaling in nature working the thought, “I want the universe to give me a clear decision” and I was listening to Pandora. When I was in the turnarounds, I heard these lyrics:

Settle down, it will all be clear.

If you get lost, you can always be found.

Know you’re not alone.

I’m going to make this place your home.

Thank you, universe. Right now, what’s true for me is a double feels like the best decision. And I’m open to my mind changing. This Thursday, I am scheduled for a pre-op visit with the surgeons to go through the details of the operation & how to prepare for it. The surgery is scheduled for April 18th. I’ve decided to just spend my time doing things I love, be present with anything else that comes up, and see what happens.

12063852_10153614523014150_8219580751430973717_n

And maybe…just maybe…Future New Boob Bethany will go from this to this!

IMG_3584

images

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Work with me from anywhere in the world…

  • Subscribe to my newsletter.
  • Join my membership program.
  • Book a private coaching session.
  • Sign up for an online event or class series.
  • Invite me to speak or create a customized event.
Cancer Diagnosis, Uncategorized

Part 1: Meeting with the Breast Surgeon right after Diagnosis

Do you heart this blog? Well, it’s now a real, live book baby! Get your copy on Amazon. #mygurucancer 

The following was written September 18th when I had my first consultation with the breast surgeon. Part 2 will describe my 2nd meeting with the surgeon on January 21st to discuss surgery options.

This morning, I woke up at 5:30am (not like me at all!) and spent a quiet morning in the dark with my mom drinking tea and doing some gentle yoga. In the midst of hamstring stretching and hip opening, I just felt the tears begin to pour out again. I welcomed them. The body just needs to do what it needs to do. She placed her hand on my back while I was in child’s pose and stroked my spine. I am so beyond happy she is here. I love her so much and feel so close to her. I love how intimate we are and that I can share this experience with her. I fell into her arms and we cried together.

I was actually really looking forward to the appointment with the breast surgeon, Dr. Ganaraj…I had my handy list of questions to ask. I was nervous yet also excited to see the doctor and learn more…get a game plan…My mom and I had a great morning walk and I got all dressed up. I decided to wear super sexy underwear to my appointment ~ if things got stressful, I could remind myself that I was wearing a secret, doctor-not-approved baby pink thong…intended to bring some comic relief to a potentially stressful situation.

While in the waiting room, I met my Health Navigator ~ I had no idea that role even existed and wow, what a brilliant idea. She handed me this phenomenal binder of information ~ everything from cancer education to treatment procedures to tips for health and wellness. I was so excited to see recommendations for writing, yoga, acupuncture, healthy diet, humor ~ this is my wheelhouse! The Health Navigator said she is here to support me through the entire process. Their team cares about my wellness as a whole and they want to hear from me anytime ~ I have everyone’s cell phone numbers and they will always return my call the same day. She looks like everyone’s favorite Grandma ~ one you could snuggle with for hours. It was a wonderful introduction and again, very impressed with conventional medicine ~ it’s not what I thought it would be. (Side note: to this day, I have never heard from my health navigator…hahahaha.)

I decided that me, my mom, and Travis should take a “cancer selfie” in the waiting room. My first cancer photo….but wait, Cancer SelfieI’ve been taking cancer photos for almost a year now and had no idea. I have to say, so far I do LOOK pretty damn good with cancer. And even more confusing (but hey – it’s good news), I FEEL really great with cancer. Aside from the whirlwind of believing stressful thoughts as if they were some kind of addictive candy…I’m kind of rocking it.

I met Dr. Ganaraj in the exam room with a big smile. She asked, “how are you doing?” My response was, “well, I’m extremely happy to see YOU!” She was surprised by my reaction and said that usually she is the last person patients want to see. She then did a manual breast exam and I pretended to ignore the extremely worried look on her face. She took measurements of the large lump in my breast and a 2nd lump that I also noticed the night before for the first time (and nearly had a panic attack). Then she measured the mass in my axilla.

I got dressed and we all met in her office. Going into this meeting, I assumed the treatment plan would be pretty simple: we would talk about surgery and then maybe a little chemo…I’d be cancer-free by the end of the year, no biggie. Apparently, I was very naive.

She said that the cancer is extremely aggressive, which is common in younger bodies.

Gulp. Think of the sexy underwear….think of the sexy underwear….NOT working.

She went on to say that there’s a large tumor in my breast and it has spread to my lymphatic system, which means it is definitely traveling throughout my body. The good news is that she doesn’t expect it has taken root anywhere else yet. She pulled up a screen to illustrate how the cancer cells form in the breast and then multiply & divide ~ it was one big blur to me. Aggressive? Really? She said that the masses are too big for surgery now ~ if she did surgery it would be mutilating to my body and could result in possible nerve damage. A series of diagnostic tests will be ordered for October 1st (the day insurance starts) to confirm if the cancer has spread anywhere else. She then recommended doing 5-6 months of chemo first with the goal of shrinking the tumors and mopping up the remaining cancer cells in my body. Surgery would come next and hopefully, the shrinkage could make me a candidate for a simple lumpectomy. Then radiation. Then 5 years of hormone therapy.

Shit. That was wayyyyy more than I was expecting.

It’s a very ODD sensation…to hear someone tell you things about your body and not be able to feel it AT ALL. Then again, would I want to feel this? Maybe reality is kind in this way. It makes it so surreal though. Is she really talking about MY body? I have cancer AND it’s this serious, really? She said the survival rate is pretty good with this type of cancer…Wait a minute…SURVIVAL rate? Is there really a chance of me dying? Could this really be how my story ends? Dying of cancer in my 30’s? My mind already started to picture Travis with his second wife since the first love of his life died of cancer. This thought is unbearable. She’s gorgeous, by the way ~ very exotic looking with long dark hair and deep green eyes…she’s a wonderful mother…and he’s happy with her. I become just a memory.

Yet, here I am. Alive. Healthy. Still married.

I told the doctor how confusing it was to hear this information, because I feel so healthy. It was a very “out of body” experience hearing her describe what’s supposedly going on in there. And geez, I’ve built a career out of being “in tune” with my body. I guess I’m not as intuitive as I thought. She looked me right in the eyes and said, “You feel healthy because you are healthy.” Ok, I think I like her.

I then asked in a shaky voice, “will I lose my hair?”

“Yes. Within the first few weeks of chemo.”

I literally felt a dagger in my heart. My hair. My boobs. My two favorite parts of my body. I was known for these things!!! Don’t you know the girl with the mermaid hair, double D boobs, and a size 2 yogini bod? That’s ME damnit and this “me” is being threatened on all levels. In high school I had the nickname of “PT” which stood for “Perfect Tits” ~ some guys at another school created a jingle for them…”Beth’s breasts are the best…”

Sigh.

The surgeon said she would set up an appointment with the oncologist right away and schedule the tests. As we said our goodbye’s, I started to feel my body tremble. I was barely holding it together. As we walked out of the office door, I completely fell apart. It was like my legs stopped working. Travis held me up as we walked through the lobby and then parking lot. My mom grabbed the keys and told us to sit in the back together. I collapsed into the car and began whaling.

There was no stopping the mind from going all over the place. Fear of death, pain, suffering consumed me. Anger, confusion, terror, shame, panic. This was a necessary vomiting of the mind and although it was one of the hardest moments, I still felt supported in the car, being held by Travis, mom driving.

I have been able to revisit this moment and identify numerous thoughts:

The cancer is spreading.

I will die young.

I won’t know what to do.

This shouldn’t be happening to me.

Chemo is poisonous to my body. Evolved people don’t choose chemo.

I created my cancer.

My body betrayed me.

Chemo will make me look sick and ugly.

I will be in unbearable pain.

I’m not intuitive/evolved. Evolved people don’t get cancer.

I’m a failure.

I should have gone to the doctor sooner.

I can’t handle this.

Cancer will prevent me from living a full life.

Cancer will ruin us financially.

And this is why I love The Work of Byron Katie. I am able to go back into a stressful experience, identify thoughts, and one-by-one, question them. As I meet each thought with understanding, I gather more and more proof that suffering only exists in my mind. It’s what I’m imagining might happen that creates my stress. It’s what I’m believing about cancer, about chemo, about my body that sends me down the rabbit hole. And what I’m believing isn’t real in the moment. I was in the car, being held, and driven home. Reality is always kinder than the movies playing in my head.

In the upcoming blogs, I will begin to share the full inquiries that have impacted me the most ~ you may be able to relate to them in your own life even without an illness, and it will give you an insight into the mind of a cancer patient.

So even though September 18th was one of the hardest days I have ever experienced, it was also a doorway into living a more fearless, present life. Thank you, Cancer.

Work with me from anywhere in the world…

  • Subscribe to my newsletter.
  • Join my membership program.
  • Book a private coaching session.
  • Sign up for an online event or class series.
  • Invite me to speak or create a customized event.

 

 

Uncategorized

Getting the Call ~ “You Have Cancer”

Do you heart this blog? Well, it’s now a real, live book baby! Get your copy on Amazon. #mygurucancer 

The following are 2 journal entries written the day of and the day after I found out about my diagnosis.

September 16th, 2015

imagesIt’s hilariously insane how many times I checked my phone today. Today could be the day I get the call. I wasn’t experiencing fear ~ it was more like an excited/anxious anticipation. The feeling I use to get right before a big basketball game in high school or before starting one of my yoga retreats.

I taught a morning yoga class and the rest of the day was open. I thought about going to get my car washed and decided to stay at home instead and dive into some Netflix Therapy while I continued my Phone Stalking. I successfully distracted myself with a new series on Netflix called “Rectify” (highly recommended!) and then Travis came home.

I was on episode 4 when I got the call. “Holy shit! This is it!” It was in the afternoon and Travis was next to me on the couch. (Thank God I didn’t go for that car wash!). The home was quiet. I answered the phone & put it on speaker. The doctor said she just got the pathology report and wanted to call me as soon as possible.

“This is the part of my job that’s really difficult. I’m afraid I have bad news. They did find cancer in both the breast and lymph node.”

Time stopped ~ there was a quiet stillness that’s hard to describe. It was as if someone else’s life was being described to me. My hand grabbed Travis’ hand. “It’s called Infiltrating Ductal Carcinoma, grade 3, and it’s the most common form of breast cancer.” Good, I thought ~ that means doctors will know how to deal with it. She shared how she recently had a patient who was 27 years old and diagnosed with the same cancer ~ she is now doing great and just had her 1st baby. “People make it through this and live very happy lives.” She said she would send the pathology report to the breast surgeon, and then find out if the surgeon recommends I wait until my insurance kicks in October 1st to have a consultation or begin now. Unfortunately, with biopsies you can not tell what stage the cancer is, or if it has spread to other areas. It started in my left breast and had definitely spread to my left lymph nodes.

My lulus have cancer. I looked down at my left breast. Really? It looks so connection2divinefine, it feels so fine other than some soreness from the biopsy. That’s cancer in there? How is this possible? As soon as I got off the phone, I turned to my husband and the tears began to flow. The best words I can use to describe how I felt were…. “surreal” and “fucking weird.” I loved how my husband held me, both crying/trembling together. I love him so much my heart could burst.

Then all of the sudden, my body got extremely hot. So hot, that I had to take my shirt off. I paced around the living room…Wow. What? Really? I remember actually pinching my arm multiple times to see if this was some sort of crazy dream. Me? Cancer? Realllllllly?

I called my mom on facetime. That was really, really hard. Nobody wants to get this phone call from their child. Seeing the tears in my mother’s eyes while I told her the news made it more real. She nodded her head, “Okay, okay.” I love that the moment I asked if she could come to Dallas, she responded with an immediate “Yes, of course.” Her ticket was booked within an hour to arrive tomorrow. We agreed that she would call my Dad and that I would call my brothers.

What started to plague my mind the most was…HOW is this possible? Why is this happening to me? How did I get cancer? I had thought that perhaps all of the inner work I did up until this point would have given me a “cancer bypass” ~ I already learned all I needed to know, right?

I’m 34. Young. Healthy. Happy. Yet, this reality is still true. I hear Byron Katie’s words, “who would you be without your reasons?” It really is the best time for me to have cancer, isn’t it? I have a healthy vehicle and the time and support to take care of this now. I have the tools to fall in love with it. I gently caressed my lulus and thanked them for showing up.

It wasn’t until 6pm that I realized how bad of a headache I had and that I hadn’t eaten lunch. Sweet Travis jumped to prepare dinner for me. Earlier, he had said, “you don’t have to do anything around the house anymore, honey. I’ll do all the cooking and all of the cleaning. I’ll go get your car washed too.” How amazing is he? I was more than happy to receive. My Dad and I traded texts ~ he said how proud he was of me for how I am handling this. I agreed. Then we texted hilarious images back and forth….my favorite one being the poop emojis with big eyes and smiley faces.

The doctor called back and said that the breast surgeon thinks that it’s fine for me to wait until October. The surgeon offered to clear time in her schedule Friday (in 2 days) for the consultation so that we can begin testing on the 1st. She said she would comp the visit since I don’t have insurance yet. Wow. Kind. Universe.

I cleared my work schedule the rest of the week. It feels like my “healing team” is all coming together.

Around 8:30pm, the body and mind just fully let go. Let Out LoveI started in a child’s pose and the tears began to pour out. Deep whaling, shaking, moaning…I just let it all out. At one point, I was hovered over the toilet, dry heaving. It
wasn’t painful, it just felt like the body needed to do its’ thing and luckily, I have had a lot of experience with emotional healing to know that all I need to do is to get out of the way. Then I laid in bed while Travis massaged my head.

Right now, it’s 3:47am. I’ve been up since 1am or so. My mind is active and I felt the need to write. I have no idea what I’ll be doing with these words. I don’t know if another eye will see them. I just know I am supposed to write. My head is starting to feel better too. Breathing.

September 17th, 2015

My mommy is here! My mommy is here! I picked her up from the airport ~ one of the BEST hugs I’ve ever experienced. There is something so soothing and comforting about being nestled into your mothers chest. I. Am. So. Happy. She. Is. Here.

BeforeOLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA she arrived, I had the morning to myself and it was magical. I did my morning “steam & tizzle.” This is a new tradition for me ~ I’ll boil ginger and turmeric root in water, place my face over the steam and breathe it in for a few minutes. Then I’ll add clove and steep a bag of decaf green tea. I love to drink the tea with unsweetened vanilla almond milk and raw honey ~ it’s incredible and is anti-inflammatory, helps with allergies, boosts immunity, cleanses, & is high in antioxidants. After my steam & tizzle, I went for my morning walk. I felt so much more present ~ like the best high I’ve ever experienced ~ the colors, sunlight, sounds were so much more alive. There was this lively sense of quiet inside of me. I’ve had similar experiences when I attend Byron Katie’s workshops & schools. Life is simple. Life is beautiful.

At the end of the walk, I talked with the property manager at our condo. He said, “I don’t mean to pry, but you’re in such great shape and you’re so beautiful ~ do you really just do yoga? I mean, you look like you’re in your 20’s.” I remembered that he had just had a mini phone consultation with my husband last week, getting tips on food/exercise/stress relief. I told him, “yes, it’s yoga, walking, and I do love rebounding and swimming. Organic foods are important to me and I’ve learned to listen to my body and eat what feels good ~ I’ve been known to rock pizza and a burger too. I also think the most important thing is to take care of the mind ~ and we use The Work of Byron Katie to deal with stress. When the mind is stressed, the body’s systems don’t work efficiently.” But then I could feel myself begin to turn “my experience” into “advice giving.” And then I blurted out, “But shit, what do I know ~ I just found out yesterday that I have cancer. So yes, you can do all of these amazing things for your body & mind and still get cancer!”

It felt good to be blunt and honest. I mean, really…what do I know about health for anyone else? Living this way feels right for me, nurturing for me. I will continue to live this way to support healing cancer. I’ve come to realize that I have created a wonderful vehicle to support cancer healing: I’m young, healthy, strong, open-minded, and know exactly how to deal with stress.

Work with me from anywhere in the world…

  • Subscribe to my newsletter.
  • Join my membership program.
  • Book a private coaching session.
  • Sign up for an online event or class series.
  • Invite me to speak or create a customized event.